I will be a year older next week. This is yet to be a date that I dread. I hope and pray that it will never be one. It has instead become a date were I find myself looking back on the faithfulness of my Father and seeing just how much He can squeeze into my lifetime.
I love my life. Not because it is good (although it is,) but because I can see tangible proof throughout the years of God;s personal involvement in my life. I become increasingly more convinced that no one's life is mere chance, and that everyone had an eternal value and purpose in their existence.
I truly believe God created me, and then simply because of His surpassing grace and loving kindness, He chose me as an instrument for Himself. I may not always know what task He has for me to do each day, but I KNOW He has me here for His own good pleasure. I rejoice in that privilege in a way words can hardly express. I rejoice even more when I think that He has chosen to give me the privilege of walking this journey with Luke, He is a treasure to me and I am constantly amazed by the way I see God's hand on Him. And the joy we both feel and having been blessed with five precious, amazing, incredible, loving, human beings; whom I pray will all willingly become an instrument for God's good, is indescribable.
My children are still young, but I already find myself, at times, mourning their infancy. It was so special to me. I loved getting to hold my sleeping children and dream about the future God had planned for them. I loved hearing them breath and feeling it on my neck where they slept. I loved hearing them hum in contentment as they ate in complete peace and security in my arms. I miss those days already. I do love the deepening of our relationship and the increasingly complex levels of our relationships as they grow and begin to understand different thing. I know I will miss these days too, and am trying SO HARD to commit these days to memory and storing these days up in my heart. But I know, and I look forward to the relationships we will have as young adults and close friends. I pray we will be fellow brothers and sisters in the not too far future.
I am grateful for every breath, for every day, for every smile, hug, laughter I am blessed to be a part of. I am privileged to be useful to the Almighty, Creator, Sustainer, and Savior of my soul. I am truly blessed beyond measure!
Here are two passages that have impressed me lately; both are prayers. The first is a prayer for provision, and contentment, the second is one of praise. You do not have to read on, but I am sure they will bless you as they have me.
Two things I ask of Thee,
Do not refuse me before I die:
Keep deception and lies far from me,
Give me neither poverty nor riches;
Feed me with the food that is my portion,
Lest I be full and deny Thee and say,
"Who is the Lord?"
Or lest I be in want and steal,
And profane the name of my God.
Oh give thanks to the Lord, call upon His name;
Make known His deeds among the peoples.
Sing to Him, sing praises to Him;
Speak of all His wonders.
Glory in His holy name;
Let the heart of those who seek the Lord be glad.
Seek the Lord and His strength;
Seek His face continually.
Remember His wonderful deeds which He has done,
His marvels and the judgements from His mouth,
O seed of Israel His servant,
Sons of Jacob, His chosen ones!
He is the Lord our God;
His judgements are in all the earth.
Remember His covenant forever,
The word which He commanded to a thousand generations,...
...Sing to the Lord, all the earth;
Proclaim good tidings of His salvation from day to day.
Tell of His glory among the nations,
His wonderful deeds among all the peoples
For great is the Lord,
And greatly to be praised;
He also is to be feared above all gods.
For all the gods of the peoples are idols,
But the Lord made the heavens.
Splendor and majesty are before Him,
Strength and Joy are in His place.
Ascribe to the Lord O families of the peoples,
Ascribe to the Lord glory and strength.
Ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name;
Bring an offering, and come before Him;
Worship the Lord in His holy array.
I Chronicles 16:8-15,23-29